Don’t get me wrong - I am a wine fan. I grew up drinking wine (albeit sickly sweet blush wine). I got my first love drunk on wine so that he’d have the courage to finally kiss me. I pride myself in discovering pinot noir years before Sideways was released. Wine and I go way back.
But I crave variety. I like a cold, crisp IPA. I’ll sip straight, warm whisky. I adore craft cocktails. I work wine through the rotation, but I’m no wino.
Since every other female in this country seems bonkers for wine, I planned a Napa wine tour as a part of my 40 B4 40. I thought an immersive experience might get my double X chromosomes going. Beefy was very sweet to arrange a wine tasting at Parduxx, in Napa, for our anniversary.
It was very fancy. We had our own sommelier who took us on a short tour before leading us to a private table in the shade of an oak. We tasted five wines and munched on crackers and cheese. I listened dutifully to the history of the winery and the crafting of each wine, but I was much more interested in our sommelier. Beefy and I quizzed him on his history with wine, his reasons for choosing to leave Chicago for Napa, and the life of a winery employee. People are more interesting than wine.
I’m going to admit it: most wine tastes the same to me. I know I like reds, the less sweet, the better, and I dislike a sulphur aftertaste. Other than that, though, wine, like all alcohol, is mostly lubrication. It makes social interactions smoother. A few hours standing in the kitchen slip by with a bottle of wine at hand. The troubles of a frustrating day at work dissolve in the glass. Wine gets the job done, but I just don’t get that excited about it.
I would absolutely hate a girls’ weekend in Napa. All wine (and all estrogen) all the time? I’m just not very good at being female. I’d rather do whisky shots, climb a mountain, and go to bed early. It’s time I just accept that.
And when I want some wine, Save Mart carries my favorite bottle: Naked Grape Pinot Noir at under $10.